5 a.m. sessions

What if God changes plans

And everything I thought I needed

Was somehow lost in this grand disguise

Where “practical” doesn’t seem so practical anymore

What if the radical is what we were always searching for?

What if we just got lost?

Every weekday morning my team and I wake up at 5 a.m. to spend an hour worshipping Jesus individually as the sun rises. After that, we have an hour of devotional spent reading His word.

I won’t lie, it isn’t always easy waking up early—most days I am rolling out of bed by 4:57 and groggily making my way to the pavilion in need of a serious heart adjustment and probably coffee, lol.

But the minute I sit down, put my headphones in and watch the beauty unfold around me, I feel His presence lye on my shoulders like a blanket. Even though I am tired, Ruach Hakodesh (Holy Spirit) becomes my rest in this moment, and I am convinced that doing this almost every morning has been/is one of the most beautiful disciplines in my journey with God that I have ever learned or maintained. And THIS is where the above poem I wrote originated from, which I wanted to share with you all!

I would consider myself someone who generally goes with the flow most of the time, especially with the smaller, more intimate details of everyday life. However, I have always been someone with a lot of dreams, passions and talents that often make thinking about the future mostly stressful. I am also a ‘do-er’—as in, the minute I decide about what I am going to do, I put my WHOLE heart into it. This isn’t all bad, but it has made adjusting to change harder when what I thought were God’s plans for my life were really just what I wanted His plans for my life to be. Needless to say, I am learning a lot about this and being okay with not having all the answers because God literally does whatever HE wants and I am just here for the ride *yee-haw*.

So recently, as I was muddling through my 5 a.m. thoughts, God placed this struggle of mine on my heart. I don’t want to get so wrapped up in always trying to make plans for my future that I forget what is happening right in front of me.

Something that has given me a lot of peace is the fact that God does not need us to do anything, but He wants us. He truly just wants you, in all of your mess and confusion and struggle to just lay it all down at His feet so He can sit with you and talk. God uses broken people all the time in scripture to do His work, but we first have to be willing to pursue a relationship with Him and actually listen to what He is asking us to do. He wants to do the radical in our lives, but we have to be willing to give up what we can’t control.

This week, I challenge you to first spend time with Yeshua in the quiet whenever you are able and ask yourself this—what 5 things do I think are too big for God to do/answer? Be honest with yourself. Write them down and then give it to Him. Just let him have it, and please let me know how I can also be praying with you ??

For I know the plans I have for, ‘declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.’” –Jeremiah 29:11